Why dip? When moon? How rocket? Where lambo? #1
The beginning of a startup founder's journey #yolo
Let me start by saying I have absolutely no idea what I am doing.
(Disclaimer: The SAT grammar section dragged down my score so please advise.)
So Why Dip?
- Currently, my stonks are probably down 40-50% from their peak. Lost about 5k trading options trying to follow gamma trends. Great time to quit your job right? Should I buy the dip? (Mama Pelosi seems to be doing so) Well, you are absolutely correct. I just quit my job and I have decided to fully buy the dip of my new startup called Okane (valuation: sub-$100; market value determined by our domain name price). If anyone else is looking to buy the dip as well, during these precarious times, please kindly reach out to us at okane-team@okane-app.com (A detailed pitch deck of questionable goals will be sent). But to answer this question simply, stonks always go up.
So Why Moon?
- It’s so hot. Ask my cofounder, Vin, who recently moved in with me. We’ve been coding non-stop with our keyboards getting moist from our sweat. Why not turn on the AC you may ask? Referring to my answer in “why dip”, all spare cash must be used on buying the dip and cannot be wasted on electricity. Elon Musk recently tweeted that going to space is the future, so Okane is my ticket out of here.
So How Rocket?
- Chrome Extensions. Fun fact, there are 1 billion users who use the chrome browser and there’s only around 200K extension applications. That’s 5000 users for every browser extension on the chrome store, assuming my math is correct. Clearly, no one wants to make an extension for a reason. But, why have I decided to make a chrome extension and bank my future on it? Well, it’s quite simple, “The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting.”― Sun Tzu, The Art of War (bless google search)
Where Lambo?
- Well, my rocketship is now live on the chrome store! It’s still in beta and we are missing a few key features, but if you are interested in seeing how I’ll be going to the moon with my gold Lambo; you can download us here. (notice how I made sure to bold this )… The first few downloads will get a complimentary picture of me in my gold lambo on mars.
I doubt anyone is going to read this, but if you have, you can subscribe? I’m desperate, I guess, IDK why you would though. Otherwise, check us out at https://okane.crd.co .
As always, HODL - Sean <3
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Lol hopefully y'all survive